Monday, November 30, 2015

SORRY I WAS GONE


HELLO! IT'S ME!
Dylan Gentile here, head and (only) ;( writer for Only In Defuniak. Our production company Dylan Gentile INCcancelled Only In Defuniak for a 6 month period due to a lack of revenue which is still pretty much non-existent, but our head producer Dylan Gentile, and our CEO Dylan Gentile decided to renew Only In Defuniak for a third season due to a general lack of interest in anything else! Hooray! To sum up the news: 
  • This company is planning to build a HUGE racetrack in the city. (Vroom, Vroom)
  • Some more cars crashed. :(
  • The Walton Braves were on a winning streak until our last home game against the bulldogs from Jacksonville. 
  • (I know I'm supposed to capitalize their mascot but I don't think they deserve it) 
  • Homecoming was awesome and I have to say I did a pretty amazing job doing class secretary stuff. (Logan just extremely disagree in the comments section)
  • I missed a bunch of city council meetings which were probably just not exciting things. (although at the last meeting I was at somebody slipped a public transportation agreement in the agenda which was approved with flying colors, although nobody can seem to tell me what it actually was)
  • And they reorganized city hall again! :)
So thanks for holding out for so long without my amazing works of literary art. A bunch of people tell me this blog makes their day, and if that's true I'm glad some drab humor can lighten up the daily news.
In return for being AMAZING, AWESOME PEOPLE, I give you this video I found on YouTube  of a dinosaur running through the dollar general parking lot:



2016 Presidential Candidate is Good Sport

INTERVIEW WITH 2016 DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE HOWELL ASTOR

So I met this 2016 Democratic presidential candidate named Howell Astor after he followed me on twitter and he was nice enough to put up with my ridiculousness and let me interview him. I'll post a link to his website after the interview:
DYLAN: "so what kind of interview do you want? we can do a serious one where your totally serious or we can do a funny one where I ask you questions I crowdsourced at the highschool today"


Howell: "I am good either way. Usually in HS students are more kicked back If you want to make it more fun, I am good with that"

DYLAN: "Alright is there anybody under the age of 27 that can help you translate slang words? Also do you know the phonetic alphabet? were you in any wars? Some kid wrote their question in military code or whatever and I can read it I just wanna see if you can, because as president your gonna have to read lots of secret documents ya'know. Whiskey Hotel yankee BREAK sierra hotel oscar uniform lima delta BREAK yankee oscar uniform BREAK bravo echo BREAK papa romeo echo sierra india delta echo nevada tango BREAK BREAK"


Howell: "I am a Blue Collar guy. I didn't have the pleasure of serving however I am sure one of my guys can interpret this code. Curious now. Whiskey?"

DYLAN: "Ok one kid just wrote "Illumanati?" so I guess this questions open to your interpretation. Next question after the illumanati one is "trump- bae or nay?""

Howell: "Three idiots reading endlessly drama BREAK Obama freak BREAK
Great Oscillating virgins endeavoring retarded numeric music BREAK. Lumanati? Sounds like cool drink. Trump is better than Hillary. I am better than trump. I would presume the "kid" who wrote that luminati would not have knowledge of ISIS. I thought this was a comical interview."

DYLAN: "You dont know what the illuminati is? Its like some secretive group at the middle of every crazy conspiracy theory. Ok my friend cleetus wanted specifics
"do you support the gays? If so what's your favorite type of gay?"

Howell: "I believe that gay marriages should be decided upon by their given state via a vote. It should be voted for or against and the majority wins. gay marriages is a highly debated subject. Let Democracy work and let it be voted on by the people. I don't get into conspiracy theories. I am just amazed that as a Presidential Candidate I didn't have to show any ID....even if I win True!"

DYLAN: "They weren't really asking what you thought about it policy wise just as a person."

Howell: "Personal feelings can't be considered when making decisions for the entire country. That is what got us in the mess we are now in."

DYLAN: "Okee Dokee"

It was a slow day at the high school I didn't manage to get that many questions, sorry.